handle with care

Everyone knows that players aren’t invincible. Nearly every match you watch will feature at least one player limping/strechered off with some sort of injury, and a quick glance at the weekly physio report from around the Premier League will confirm as much. Some are severe, requiring lengthy rehabilitation spells, while others are simple knocks that only keep them out of action for the rest of the match.

Aston Villa Support Stan Petrov

before this season, you didn't often hear of players having major medical issues. this year, they're damn near omnipresent.

Oddly though, these expected injuries seem to enrage us. How can they get hurt so often, when it’s their job to stay fit?

This unrealistic expectation normally boils to the surface whenever a player falls victim to repeated injury blights. Think of all the ridicule leveled at Arsenal’s Robin van Persie during his extended and repetitive injury spells over the last few years. Fans and media members alike skewered the Dutchman for glass-like fragility, even throwing him to the wolves when he sought out alternative – albeit an odd alternative — methods for finally getting healthy.

However, injuries that result from playing or occur during training are expected parts of the modern game, especially considering the congested fixture calendars and pre-season tours that players are subjected to these days. Ultimately, they annoy us, but there’s no possible way we can completely eradicate them from the sport.

What isn’t expected, though, are illnesses that fall outside the realm of football. Yes, we’ve grown accustomed to a player picking up an injury from time to time. But the news of a player being diagnosed with potentially life-threatening disease always seems to catch us by surprise. Which is odd, because the same thing happens to us “commoners” all the time.

Modern professionals are already blessed with speed, strength and athleticism that the average fan could only dream of having. With so many perceived “superhuman” qualities, we can be forgiven for believing our on-pitch heroes should also be immune to the ailments that trouble normal folk.

Unfortunately, this season we’ve seen that isn’t exactly the case..

Barcelona's Eric Abidal Scar

abidal had to go under the knife a second time to treat his liver cancer. hopefully they at least gave him a matching scar on the right... you know, because aesthetics are important.

Milan’s Antonio Cassano suffered a stroke on a return flight after a match, thanks to a small hole found in his heart. Manchester United’s Darren Fletcher was diagnosed with an inflammatory bowel disease, which has kept him out of action since November. Aston Villa captain Stiliyan Petrov was unexpectedly forced to retire from the game after he was diagnosed with acute leukemia. Barcelona’s Éric Abidal had to have a liver transplant last week after it was determined that an earlier surgery to remove a tumor was unsuccessful. Fabrice Muamba’s heart stopped and didn’t beat on its own for over an hour after he collapsed on the White Hart Lane pitch.  And then just last week there was the tragic passing of Livorno’s Piermario Morosini, who also suffered a massive heart attack mid-match.

With such a high number of major medical problems plaguing the game in such a short time span, you can’t help but suddenly feel alarmed for the players. You wonder things like “Is playing soccer make an inherently dangerous to a player’s health?” I mean I still play a significant amount myself, so in the interest in self-preservation, I should also probably ask “Am I at risk?”

Luckily, the players are asking themselves the same questions.

The day after Muamba’s cardiac arrest, the entire Tottenham playing staff demanded to have heart evaluations. A natural response given the circumstances, though it was alarming to learn that such exams aren’t regular requirements for professional players. Considering how much is invested in them, you would’ve thought that the clubs would want to protect those investments a little more proactively. But in most cases — outside of the medical conducted upon a player’s initial signing — they’re rarely ever put through any cardiac testing or check-ups. Which is even more odd, because this isn’t a new battle that players have just recently begun to fight.

Former Manchester City and Lyon midfielder Marc-Vivien Foe died on pitch during the Confederations Cup in 2003. Sevilla winger Antonio Puerta died three days after a series of on field heart attacks in 2007, and was followed several months later by Motherwell skipper Phil O’Donnell. Espanyol captain Daniel Jarque was also lost to a heart attack, though his occurred after hours during preseason in 2009. There have been some near misses, too. Rubén de la Red, a promising Real Madrid prospect, was forced to retire two years ago thanks to a heart condition that saw him collapse during a 2008 Copa del Rey match. Or how about young Belgian Anthony Van Loo being shocked back to life by his implanted defibrillator in this shocking 2009 video:

Look, we all know that playing the beautiful game is a physically taxing activity, and that it puts increased strain on our hearts and lungs. For most of us it’s a good thing, and we could probably all stand to get more of that kind of activity. But for the professionals that are out there each day in training and match days, that can be a lot of cumulative stress.  Darren Fletcher’s bowel issues are also thought to be the partially cause of stress — both physical and emotional — and could necessitate surgery to remove his colon. I’m no doctor, but I would have to think that the prevalence of such traumatic health problems should at least be cause for looking into the how stress is affecting players’ bodies.

The general assumption is that players are stretched too thin due to the number of games the modern game demands. Ideally, we would roll back the number of games they’re expected play. But in a world where the thirst for top flight football is growing exponentially — meaning there’s money to be made if matches are played — that’s not remotely possible.

Even if we’re not going to be rolling back the playing time expectations, I think an important Plan B would be for clubs to at least take a greater interest in the health of their players. If regular exams and physicals aren’t the norm, they should be. You would expect that regular heart screenings, stress tests, and general physical exams would be the bare essentials for a sport where fitness is so pivotal. And while it’s highly unlikely that Abidal’s or Petrov’s ailments are the result of football-induced stress, perhaps if the players were subjected to more frequent medical screenings, earlier diagnoses could have been made.

Chelsea's Eva Carneiro

i promise that i'm not abdicating more medical presence in football just so i can see more of eva carneiro.

And if all of these are things that do happen on the regular, could someone tell us about it? Otherwise we fans feel like we’re being left in the dark, thinking that the players have to resort to visiting Serbian witch doctors for crackpot placental treatments.

Regardless of the treatment they’re receiving, it’s not all gloom and doom when it comes to player health these days. Muamba was just released from hospital following his extended stay. Post heart surgery, Cassano recently returned to action for Milan and has been given a clean bill of health by his doctors. And even Salvador Cabañas, a player who was shot in the head nearly two years ago, has defied the odds and returned to playing in his native Paraguay.

If nothing else, these small miracles are enough to give courage and strength to those other players currently suffering with such issues. But we also can’t forget that these players are far more fragile than they appear, and major medical procedures are far from an exact science. Quick fixes will do nothing but conceal the problem that lies underneath. Player health needs more attention — plain and simple — and we’ll only have ourselves to blame if another youngster is lost because everyone simply assumes that professional athletes are in prefect health.

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ten words or less #45

tim lieweke, david beckham and bruce arena

you have to wonder if beckham knew about the galaxy's new kits before he agreed to come back to MLS.

I don’t know about any other bloggers, but sometimes I go through spells where I feel like I have absolutely nothing to write about, which are then followed by very brief periods where I feel like I have a million things I need to share. Right now, I’m in the middle of one of the busy bits. I’ve got at least four separate pieces I’m working on at the moment, so if nothing else, you’ve got some original content coming shortly…. Hooray, right?!

Additionally, I feel like I’m going to wet myself in anticipation of Tottenham’s clash with Manchester City this Sunday. The thrashing the Citizens gave Spurs back in August seems like eons ago. And even though the city-loaned Adebayor won’t be allowed to play, the Citizens are lacking key players (thanks to the Africa Cup of Nations) and aren’t in the best form. If Spurs win, they cement themselves as title contenders. If they lose, well, they’re just being Tottenham. Lot’s riding on this game, hence my bladder-exploding excitement.

In the meantime, enjoy these recent works by other people:

Maybe Spurs shouldn’t be buying a new centerback this window. – eplindex.com

I need a game like this to come to Android. – kckrs.com

No matter what your team nickname is, these aren’t acceptable. – football-shirts.co.uk

Appreciating the defensive midfielder. Best article of this young year. – inbedwithmaradona.com

Finally: the Open Cup will be a proper cup competition. – theoriginalwinger.com

Wherever Tévez goes, drama is sure to follow. – thespoiler.co.uk

The quaint nature of Non-League football is sometimes overwhelming. – pitchinvasion

If Adidas make these in white, I might ditch Nike. – soccerbible.com

A “How to look like Leon Best” instructional video… sorta. – youtube.com

You’ve never heard of the world’s most prolific, active goalscorer. – thescore.com

a winter abroad

Two months. Eight weeks. Sixty days. It’s not a whole lot of time no matter how you look at it. But it seems to be the magic time span these days, at least for MLS players it seems.

aston villa's robbie keane and everton's landon donovan

by allowing its most prized possessions to go on loan each winter, is MLS playing with fire?

Whether urged on by Klinsmann’s pleas for American players to get more time in competitive playing environments, or spurred on by the past successes of the short-term moves of MLS-bigwigs, the growing fad in American soccer is to get yourself a two-month, winter loan to Europe.

There have been no shortage of temporary moves to Europe this MLS off-season. Of course there have been the hyped moves involving the loans of high-profile players like L.A. Galaxy duo Landon Donovan and Robbie Keane — who have moved to Everton and Aston Villa respectively — and Red Bull’s Thierry Henry return to Arsenal. But there have been lesser heralded moves too, such as West Ham’s move for F.C. Dallas defender George John and L.A.’s Omar Gonzalez heading to Nürnberg.

A number of other players are trialing or training with European sides to gain some experience, and hopefully attract a foreign bid or two. I’ve written a good deal about Brek Shea’s two months with Arsenal, but there have also been shorter training stints for at least fifteen MLS players. That’s included youngster Juan Agudelo at Stuttgart and Liverpool, Robbie Rogers and Kyle Beckermann at Kaiserslautern, and Tim Ream at Bolton and West Brom, just to name a few.

With the temporary moves coming for players all over the MLS spectrum — from established stars to up-and-comers — it’s promising that there appears to be a growing demand for the league’s improving talent pool. It’s a sign Europe’s elite sides are starting to at least consider that we’re a country capable of producing a decent amount of quality players worth having a look over.

However, I do have to wonder if all of these moves are the greatest thing for MLS.

For most of the young players, the moves will end up being nothing more than glamorous learning opportunities. Their goal will be to make the most of the time training with a different class of players, therefore raising their game or at least picking up the habits of higher level professionals. They’ll get the extra competitive football experience that the Jürgs says our country’s set up is lacking, and hopefully they’re return to their MLS clubs with a sharper knowledge of the game, and everyone will be happy.

But while MLS seems content to allow it’s shining gems to go out and grow themselves, it feels like they’re turning a blind eye to the fact that it’s also a great opportunity for the finest young talent in the league to showcase themselves to other, wealthier employers. I mean I can’t imagine a single one of those players not going into those trials/loans/trainings thinking: This is the chance I’ve been waiting for… I better not blow it!

This open door policy has already seen Robbie Rogers turn his brief spell in Germany into a transfer to Leeds United. Tim Ream’s time with Bolton also looks to have paid dividends, as the Wanderers look set to spend their Gary Cahill money on a transfer for the ginger-tinged Red Bulls defender. George John’s loan terms with West Ham have an option to buy if he manages to impress during his two months at Upton Park, so he could be off too.

They’ve got a name for this type of issue: talent drain. And with MLS seemingly giving its blessing for foreign sides to take a free look at their best players, it comes off as them accepting their place as a stepping stone league. This flies in the face of the Commish has stated on several occasions, which is to turn Major League Soccer into one of the preeminent tournaments in the world.

robbie rogers at leeds united

it seems that robbie roger's short term move to europe this winter has paid off... for now at least.

Now maybe MLS does a much better job reinvesting the millions in transfer money they rake in during these sales than I’m giving them credit for, and if that’s the case, I’ll happily eat my words. But in the mean time, I’m going to assume that it’s still a bit of a risky strategy.

And all of that only takes into account the youngsters. What about all of the veteran, star players tacking two months onto their seasons; how can their departures possibly hurt the league?

First, Klinsmann’s desire to see American players securing loans or training spells in Europe is centered on his belief that the MLS season is too short. That does hold true for many players who teams don’t make the playoffs, or exit them early. Problem is, all of the high-profile loans have involved players whose teams made deep playoff runs. Keane and Donovan were both directly involved in the MLS Cup game winning goal. Hell, Keane hasn’t really had a break from training since the beginning of the last European season when he was still with Spurs. So none of them are in a position where they’re lacking for matches or sharpness, especially when you consider that Donovan and Keane are also still logging serious minutes with their respective national teams.

Ultimately, star players being loaned out during the MLS close season does nothing but put extra miles on their valuable legs. And extra miles on (mostly) older legs usually end up leading to one of three outcomes: 1) increased susceptibility to injuries, 2) burnout or 3) both.

Don’t believe me? It’s already happened, twice.

The gigantic risk MLS exposes itself to is best embodied by David Beckham rupturing his Achilles tendon playing for Milan two winters ago. Beckham’s move was supposed to help him earn a place in the following summer’s England World Cup squad — something MLS considered of great benefit at the time — ended up costing the league dearly when he was forced out of the entire MLS season. Regardless of the size of potential media-exposure gains the league would have received from Beck’s participation in South Africa, it was likely dwarfed by the lack of match-day ticket revenue the league missed out on by not having him play.

For those saying “Well that was over two years ago,” this isn’t something that only occurs in the past. As it turns out, MLS has already suffered one winter-loan casualty so far this season. And ironically, it’s not even one of their big guns that’s gone down injured. Instead, it was L.A. Galaxy’s Omar Gonzalez, a younger player who should have become a regular feature in the USMNT’s back line in 2012. But thanks to a collision with “American” teammate Timmy Chandler during his first training session after signing a 2-month loan with Nuremberg, the MLS Defender of the Year will now be out for at least the next seven months… a.k.a. most of the upcoming MLS season.

an injured beckham on loan to milan

losing beckham for a season apparently hasn't phased MLS at all. but, will lightening strike twice?

And though the loss of Gonzalez won’t really hit MLS in the pocketbook the way Beckham’s absence did, it will undoubtedly be a big hurdle to overcome in the Galaxy’s defense of their crown. But if MLS end up losing Donovan, Henry and/or Keane to injury during their loan spells, it will hurt them both on the field and off.

Let’s assume the trend of taking MLS players on loan continues to grow next season (I’d be willing to wager that it probably will), the amount of risk they’ll expose themselves to each off-season will go up exponentially. I’m not sure how great of a scenario the league could be getting themselves into unless the think about these types of moves in a bigger picture.

Look, these loans and trials are ultimately a good thing if they lead to the development of better American players. I’m all for them leading to more American players playing in more competitive leagues in Europe, and the added benefit we could see from the increased levels of experience. But I want to make sure that such moves aren’t undercutting MLS’s mission and efforts to develop better American players. We need to protect the investments we’ve made so far, and that protection requires a wide variety of issues to consider. Here’s hoping MLS and US Soccer did their homework before allowing this policy to become more common place.

In the mean time, we can’t do anything other than sit back and see how this season’s off-season MLS moves shift out. Obviously, I’m hoping that nothing but great news. Trust me when I say that there is nothing I want less than for me to look back in two months and say “I told you so.”

new year’s resolutions

As 2011 winds to a close and the dawn of a new year is upon us, I imagine many of you are in the final stages of planning for the annual — and often eventually pointless — ritual called “New Year’s Resolutions”. Every year, millions around the world make commitments to achieve personal goals over the next year such as losing a set amount of weight, breaking bad habits or forming good new ones.

times square soccer ball

now that a very soccer ball-ish times square ball has dropped, it's time to think about what we want to have happen in 2012

However, despite these resolutions generally being made with the best of intentions, for one reason or another, we normally have a hard time keeping them. Scientists tell us that only 12% of all of New Year’s Resolutions are actually met by year’s end, a rate poor enough to make you wonder why we even make them in the first place.

Personally, I like to take the easy way out by not botering to make resolutions, period. By taking this approach, it prevents me from feeling disappointed when I don’t meet the overly ambitious targets I always end up setting for myself. After all, the easiest goals to achieve are the one’s you never make… or something like that.

But just because I don’t set my own resolutions, that doesn’t mean that I can’t make empty promises for other people instead.

Why pass up soaking in all of the instant gratification of setting ambitious goals, especially when I’m not responsible for any of the work that goes into turning dreams into reality?!

With that in mind, I present to you my idealistic 2012 World Football New Year’s Resolutions list:

For Mario Balotelli to keep being… Mario Balotelli

 balotelli why always me

i don't know why, mario... but let's hope it stays that way.

To say that the young Manchester City starlet has endured a roller coaster 2011 might just be the understatement of the year. From the highs of driving around Manchester’s city centre in a convertible giving fans high fives, to the lows of lighting his own bathroom on fire with fireworks, the Italian starlet has been nothing short of a machine at producing ridiculous headlines. He seems more at home in a made-up comic strip than in the life of a real, live professional athlete. And that’s just the way we like it, especially since he tends to make my job writing significantly easier. So please, Super Mario, don’t go changing anything. Just keep being you: it’s what you do best.

For Jürgen Klinsmann to show his grand USMNT experiment is actually working.

Now, don’t take this the wrong way. I’m all for Klinsmann’s efforts to reshape the national team and build it a new identity, and I know that this transformation won’t happen overnight. It needs some time to set in, like any master plan, and I feel like a pretty patient guy. However, it’s hard to stomach loses and ties against sides that we had been — and should still be — beating. I’m not asking for us to start rolling over Mexico like the Spanish would Andorra, but I would prefer to see us start stringing together some positive results sooner rather than later. A continued run of bad showings could, after all, have a devastating impact on the team’s moral and confidence. And that’s definitely not something we need heading into World Cup qualifying.

For John Terry to finally get what’s coming to him.

I’ve made no secret for my distaste for Terry in this space, so it’s not surprising that I would want for fate to finally catch up with the bastard in 2012. And even though I don’t need to recant all of his sins since most of them have played out publicly, I still want to. So, here’s why John’s karma is long overdue to bite Mr. Chelsea: 2001) drunkenly taunts American tourists at Heathrow airport immediately after 9/11, 2002) charged with assault for an altercation with a nightclub bouncer, 2009) takes cash bribes to give unauthorized tours of Chelsea’s Stamford Bridge, 2010) may or may not have had an affair with a former teammate/friend’s baby mama, 2011) racially abuses the younger brother of international teammate during a match. Even though he’s been “cleared” in a majority of those cases, how can one guy be investigated for so many claims and they all be false? Oh yeah, they can’t. Cue the Law & Order dun-dun!

For Jose Mourinho to finally to overhaul Barcelona as the best side in Spain.

mourinho eye poke

if mourinho doesn't come out on top soon, i fear for eyes the world over.

I know it’s pretty unrealistic to think this could happen in the 2012 calendar year, despite the fact that Real are currently three points clear of rivals Barça going into the Winter Break. Pep Guardiola and his men definitely still have a death-grip like hold over Mourinho and his charges’ confidence, as is evident with their impressive strings of results in the multitude of Clásicos in 2011. And while I’d love to see Los Blancos regain the edge in the rivalry for reasons that include restoring “parity” to Spain (and I very loosely use the word parity considering it’s a league where only two teams ever win) and being a fan, my main reason for wanting to see Mourinho finally overcome his demons is much, much more important. You see, I fear that if the Special One’s galácticos don’t take over the crown as Spain’s best soon, I think he’s going to poke out EVERYONE’s eyes.

For Alex Morgan to increase the number of shoots she books like this one.

So what if I’m married? I’m allowed to have internet crushes on attractive celebrities just like anyone else. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with desiring to see more scantily clad pictures of my chosen crush. I mean as far as the picture shown, it underlines her ability to look attractive in both classy and sporty attire, not to mention her ability to knock the balls around… knock balls around the pitch you dirty perverts. And thanks to the WUSA WPS getting a renewed lease on life from US Soccer, Miss Morgan should stay in the limelight just a little bit more.

For Daniel Levy to not only continue sticking to his guns on not selling, but also pull the trigger on some big buys too.

Look, I’m stoked that the Tottenham chairman told Chelsea to shove their £40 million for Modrić where the sun doesn’t shine over the summer. It showed ambition, and sent a message to the rest of the growing egos in the locker room that nobody was bigger than the club. But aside from the last minute swoop for Rafa van der Vaart two summers ago and the bargain buying of Scott Parker from a desperate-for-cash West Ham, Levy hasn’t exactly shown any willingness to spend to match the club’s ambition. Though the free signing of Brad Friedel and the short-term solution of Adebayor up top have proven to be shrewd bits of business, the club desperately need to make a statement buy. Otherwise, can Spurs really consider themselves title challengers if we’re the only side that’s not continuously bringing in world class, young talent? I don’t think so.

For Neymar to finally move to a team in Europe, and for said team, to make him cut his hair.

neymar and his hair

hey, rufio. leave your hair in brazil once you leave for europe.

It might just be me, but I’ve grown extremely tired of the weekly Neymar transfer rumors. At this point, I’m not sure if the constant stream of “done deal” rumors to Real Madrid/Barcelona are actually true, or if it’s just an elaborate ruse by Santos to raise their asking price for the extremely talented young starlet. And if anything was learned from Barcelona wiping the floor with Santos at the Club World Cup final, it’s that Neymar needs to move on to a club where he’ll be pushed to raise the level of his game… and that clearly can’t happen in Brazil. And let’s be honest, a classier club will actually make the kid cut off his stupid rooster hair so he looks like a proper footballer.

For Blackburn Rovers owners Venkeys to finally put their manager out of his misery.

Don’t let yesterday’s upset win away at Old Trafford fool you: even a blind squirrel finds a nut from time to time. Said plainly, Rovers boss Steve Keane is not a Premier League caliber manager. The rumors of his impending sacking have been circulating since at least the tail end of last season. And to be completely honest with you, I have no clue how he’s still in his job. The Ewood Park outfit have struggled in nearly every department on field this season, and the fans have stood in unison for months saying that want the poor guy out. Maybe the Venkeys think they can save themselves from the drop if they just stick it out with the same manager all season, who knows. But regardless of whether you have a shit manager or not, if you don’t end up spending a significant amount of money to bring in fresh blood this January, you are going down.

For Carlos Tévez to end up at A.C. Milan.

With the dispute between Carlitos and City having now extended an entire half of a season, the Citizens are finally ready to rid themselves of this headache permanently. And luckily, they’ve lowered their asking price enough that a few other clubs are at least considering the thought of making a move for the temperamental striker. Though Corinthians have renewed their interest, the club making the most noise about signing Tévez are the Rosaneri. So why do I want him to end up there? Well, if Carlos is signed permanently, Milan will have the undisputed craziest front line in the world: Robinho (the brat), Pato (the indifferent), Cassano (the mad hatter), Ibrahimović (the bully) and Tévez (the ego). And with Silvio Berlusconi resuming his duties as club chairman, I’m really hoping he forces Allegri to play all five of them at once.

And lastly, for Fernando Torres to keep looking like this:

sulking torres on chelsea bench

ten words or less #41

mourinho rides callejon

callejón is content to be josé mourinho's "human segway".

I literally had to flip a coin to decide which picture would end up as the headlining selection for this week’s post. It was a dead heat between the eventual winner entitled José Rides Forward and Beckham Budweiser Ballin’. Each is awesome in their own right for various reasons. But I’m glad Mourinho won out though: just look how intensely he’s riding José Callejón, like an overdressed Portuguese jockey in the Kentucky Derby. The ride also must have proven inspirational for Callejón, as he bagged a brace in the very next game out for the Spaniards.

Picture of the week honors? Fate chose wisely.

Are Spain slipping, or is del Bosque losing the plot? - zonalmarking.net

Dear family members: here’s what I want for Christmas. – soccerbible.com

Marketing gone bad… so bad it could literally hurt. – football-shirts.co.uk

Which unnamed DP will be the recipient of this money? – kckrs.com

So what if it’s Nike’s old commercial in reverse. Brilliant. – grantland.com
(…props to my boy Marc for digging this out)

Marouane Fellaini: The Human Chia Pet. – FHM.com

Anybody else feel like booking a trip to Buenos Aires? - hotelbocajuniors.com

The tactics behind this week’s super entertaining Barça-Milan match. – zonalmarking.net

ten words or less #40

a.c. milan's antonio cassano

i left a get well card for cassano at the italian embassy. i sure hope he gets it.

I spent a majority of last week in the Nation’s Capital for my real world job’s annual company meeting, and to be honest, I’m completely worn out from it still. While capping off the event by partying into the wee hours of the night at the gorgeous Italian Embassy was a blast, I have to admit that I was a bit disappointed that there wasn’t a small practice pitch on the facility grounds. Though considering the trouble that Serie A clubs have just trying to find the funds to build the desperately needed new grounds back home, perhaps it was a bit foolish of me to expect anything different in their small enclave in D.C.

Luckily, I found these links below to be of sufficient quality to fill my footy void.

Your owner cares only when you vote with your wallet. – twistedblood.co.uk

MLS latest attendance figures = Progress! – examiner.com

Bromley’s QR code haircuts: as stupid as they sound. – kickette.com

There’s no reading in football. – dirtytackle.net

My thoughts on Manchester United’s leaked 2012-2013 kits: Gag. – footballshirtculture.com
(the equally gagging away kit is here)

Qatar 2022: now featuring 100% less promised air conditioning. – soccernet.com

Retro-ish 20th anniversary Umbro Speciali’s? Yes please. – kckrs.com

This is why there are no African David Silva’s. – inbedwithmaradona.com

trouble in the city

manchester city's carlos tevez and roberto mancini

an unsettled tevez is the largest of mancini's problems with the city strike corps.

As we broach the halfway point of the summer signing period, it’s fair to say that the transfer docket has been a busy one already. Big money moves by the traditional powers across Europe have been popping  up on the news radar since the days immediately following the close of last season:

Let’s not forget the rumor mill either, as headlines linking power sides like Barcelona (who have all but signed the dynamic Alexis Sánchez), Chelsea (links to just about everyone), and Juventus (failing miserably so far, but still in for Kun Agüero) to star names the world over. So expecting further transfer excitement this summer is a given.

Of course, there’s one other big player in the transfer market that I haven’t mentioned thus far… everyone’s favorite oil-rich side, Manchester City. City have been, predictably, linked to every player on the planet just as they have for since Sheikh Mansour’s takeover two seasons ago. (I’m convinced that they throw their hat into every transfer discussion, even if they’re not actually interested, simply to drive up the price for their rivals).

And for those concerned that the world will continue to be flipped upside down with mega bids left and right, the Citizens picked up right where they left off in January. Already completed are the signings of Arsenal’s Gaël Clichy and Partizan’s Stefan Savić, both of whom will bolster City’s wide defensive options. Neither of those acquisitions is that surprising when you consider the style of play adopted by manager Roberto Mancini, who always seems more than content to pack it in and hold out for draws.

At the attacking end of the pitch, on the surface it also appears that they’re getting even stronger without spending an (additional) dime. Disregarding the existing strikers on staff, the sky blues will also the return of several class strikers to City of Manchester Stadium Etihad Stadium this summer from various loans. Craig Bellamy returns from the wilds of the Championship, and Adebayor returns from a decent spell at Real Madrid.

craig bellamy and roberto mancini of manchester city

something tells me that bellamy is putting on a fake smile here.

It would be foolish to think that there won’t be other signings (including what could be a retarded move for Arsenal’s Samir Nasri, who is essentially the same type of player as David Silva), so you could forgive someone for thinking that they might just be unbeatable next year.

So while all of that makes Citeh look like certain trophy challengers, I can’t shake the nagging feeling that the team’s current offensive circumstances might be a sign that their master plan to become a world power might not be going to plan.

Bellamy hates Mancini
Since it’s been a while since the Welshman has made any relevant headlines, it might be worth me hashing out a quick refresher on the Craig Bellamy-Manchester City story. Let’s just say, it could best be described as “rough”:

  • January 2009: City sign Bellamy from West Ham, their first “big” offensive signing of the Oil Era, for a reported £14 million. Craig leaves the Hammers among rumors that he was forcing his way out of the squad.
  • December 2009: Bellamy threatens to leave the Citizens over the firing of manager Mark Hughes, and is subsequently dropped by new manager Roberto Mancini.
  • August 2010: Fearing that he might not make the Mancini’s 25-man EPL roster after the arrivals of Carlos Tévez, Jô (back from his Everton loan), Roque Santa Cruz and eventually Mario Balotelli, Bellamy mulls retirement and expresses frustration with Mancini’s lack of faith in him. He eventually leaves on loan to Championship side Cardiff City, his hometown club.
  • June 2011: Hoping to make his loan to Cardiff permanent, Craig asks that City let him leave on a free transfer. The sky blue’s respond by slapping a £4m price tag on him… very unaffordable for such a small club.
The Welshman recently stated that he fully expects City to let him rot in the reserves this year unless a club meets their valuation of him, and that he and Mancini haven’t spoken since the week after the Italian arrived at the club. Old legs and a nasty injury record do give some weight to Mancini’s position, but a player of Bellamy’s… uh… pedigree festering on the bench would be equivalent to a cancer in the dressing room. And we already know how bad that can get.

Džeko could be impotent.
It’s still too early to call the Bosnian a bust, but I think the Bosnian is a bust. Six goals in 21 appearances for the Citizens is under-performing when you cost 27 million and reportedly asked for 175k per week in wages, unless you’re Chelsea and think that’s a great return compared to their baby-faced flop.

City will undoubtedly really want Džeko to make a u-turn this season, and a return to the form he showed at Wolfsburg (85 goals in 135 matches) would be a gigantic boost for next season’s prospects. It’s a steep hill to climb back to that level though, and if his confidence in front of goal carries over from last season, it could be a very difficult hill to climb.

If Džeko does want to reach his lofty purchase price, someone needs to make sure he doesn’t ask this guy for advice.

emmanuel adebayor at manchester city

will adebayor be able to secure a permanent deal at real madrid to escape his city hell?

Adebayor hates City.
You have to give to Ade: the guy has the uncanny ability to always stumble up. Regardless of where he plies his trade, the Togolese striker has starts the stint wonderfully, ends it woefully, but still manages to turn his next gig into a better one (see his goals to games ratio during his career).

Manchester City quickly looked to loan off the big man after his production started to fall off, and newer shinier strikers began arriving on the regular. And when he predictably put in a decent showing while on loan at Real Madrid, you just knew that Adebayor would try to trip into a permanent deal at the most historically successful club of all time.

Unable to secure a deal before the close of last season, Emmanuel headed back to Manchester for preseason. But Roberto Mancini long ago deemed the striker surplus to requirements, and left him off the club’s preseason travel roster. Naturally, this angered Ade. Seeing that the player and club’s relationship over the last year could best be described as tepid, I can’t imagine that now he would be even close to the type of player you would want mingling amongst your squad.

Balotelli is certifiably crazy.
I don’t care if he is giving away money and providing youngsters with (shoddy) advice; I’m not going to be fooled. There’s not really any need for me to elaborate, but if you really want to hear my thoughts on the Italian wild child… let me just leave this here.

Let’s just say putting all of your chips in the crazy kid’s corner on the goal scoring front might not be the wisest decision.

Tévez needs to leave.
For the longest time now, I’ve thought Carlos Tévez has just been a whiny bitch. He complains about life in England and how he’s not found anything to do there in five years, but he’s not even bothered to learn English. Tévez has long said that he’s been considering retirement, despite having his peak years ahead of him and lot’s more earning power. He came off as mercenary punk during his exit from Manchester United, and then rubbed his previous supporters’ faces in the mud by openly mocking them after joining their biggest rivals. And for the better part of 6 months, he’s been trying to squeeze his way out of City.

But if you were to ask me whether all of the drama that comes with employing Tévez would be worth having him on my team, I would overwhelmingly tell you “yes.” There’s no arguing that the mercurial Argentine is one of the most productive strikers in the game, bagging 86 goals in 180 matches for the two Manchester clubs. He has an engine that never stops, an asset that can’t be overvalued as he does it on both sides of the ball. Simply put, his on pitch efforts outweigh all of that, and I suspect that’s why clubs puts up with him.

What I didn’t realize though, was there was another driving factor in Carlos’ hope to leave the Citizens. While it’s clear that striker is at least a little unsettled, it’s really his wife who has had it with life in England. She’s already threatened to leave her fabulously rich husband because it’s so horrible in the British Isles. I mean, her husband’s band doesn’t even have a charted pop hit in England! How is this possible?!?! And while the two temporarily patched things up, she’s already moved back to Argentina, and me thinks she’s threatened to leave him permanently if he doesn’t follow her home. You can’t blame a guy for wanting to do what it takes to keep his family together.

Whether or not Corinthians or Boca Juniors, the only clubs that Tévez says he’d go back to South America for, have the ability to shell out the funds necessary to pry one of the elite strikers on the planet away from City remains to be seen. I suspect that if Carlos does go back to one of those clubs, it will only be if his “agent” Kia Joorbachian ponies up some of the fee himself and resumes his 3rd party ownership role (which is fairly prevalent in the Argentine and Brazilian spheres).

A lot needs to happen for Tévez to be reunited with his family anytime soon, and sadly for him, he may have to retire to make it happen.

The others are unproven or not good.
I’m not going to waste my breath talking about Jô, who is miraculously getting some looks from some Russian Premier League sides, as he clearly can’t cut it in England. Roque Santa Cruz was washed up when City signed him, and he’ll be lucky to trick Blackburn into taking him back again. Alex Nimely, a 20-year-old Liberian striker who’s been at the club since 2008, hasn’t sniffed the pitch during a first team match yet.

Needless to say, if two of Tévez, Adebayor and Bellamy leave, the Citizens definitely need to bolster their attacking ranks.

—————————————-

Look, I’m not trying to write Manchester City off this season. Their pockets are too deep, their playing staff too talented, and they did well enough last season with similar problems to qualify for the Champions League. To discount them, even with their strike force’s plethora of problems, would be nothing short of foolish. But if I were a City supporter (and due to their badass line with Umbro, I sometimes wish I was), I would be extremely worried about those problems.

If you’re trying to chase glory with three unsettled and unhappy strikers looking to move away, an overpriced dud, and a player who belongs in a straight jacket, even with all the talent in the rest of the squad… well, don’t expect to make it any higher than you’ve already made it.

wrong side XI: center back (libero)

this is part V in the “wrong side XI” series, where i’ll be selecting my very own starting eleven, assuming of course that i could choose any player from any team in the world. you can read the rules i’ll be following to make my team selection, and what formation i’ll be squeezing them into, on the first post in the series.

david luiz, per mertesacker, thiago silva, daniel agger and thomas vermaelen

the libero: the defenders who can't quite give up their aspirations to be offensive stars.

Once upon a time, in between stints of playing in my favored left back spot, I often took up residence as a centerback. I was never particularly fond of it, much because playing the position made me feel like i had a leash around my neck that was tied to the penalty box. But as often as possible, I would break my invisible chain and make forays into the attack. Much to the chagrin of my coach, of course.

And though I didn’t know it at the time, the style with which I played the position actually had a name: libero. When I first learned that factoid, the defensive volleyball position of the same name came to mind. And for those familiar with both sports, it’s a perfect description for this type of player: a player who defense starts the offense. However, let’s also keep in mind what I wrote in the first post about this position:

“the more offensive oriented back will be free to occasionally make a run into the attack”

Generally though, these occasional flights into the offensive half should coincide with the launch of counter attacks. That’s not to say that the libero can’t join in an offensive passing movement from time to time, but his primary concern regardless of how the attack is flowing is to make sure if he goes forward that someone is stepping in to plug his hole (quit laughing).

Defensively, the role of the libero and the normal center back is practically indistinguishable. Organize the defense, keep an eye on the striker(s) and prevent the other team from scoring. Simple as pie, right?

Surprisingly, what I came to find when it was time to decide who would be considered for my libero spot, is that there really aren’t that many players that are solely classified as liberos. Everyone is just classified as center backs, center halves, or sweepers. Ultimately, that means that I have the freedom to go out and choose whomever I want, because no one is really classified as one.

So who did I classify as a libero? Read on my friends…

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who’s wearing the pants in this relationship?

“The MLS”, as it is known in Europe, is kind of a big deal these days.

The league actually gets TV revenue now, as opposed to the opening years when they had to pay to get their games on the tube. There are clubs that are actually turning profits, a welcomed and hoped for goal by a league that’s long been in the red. It’s average attendances are up. The play on the pitch has improved despite increasing the size of the league. There are real rivalries now. Big-time designated players are still making an impact on and off the pitch without bankrupting the league like it’s predecessor, the NASL.

david beckham of the l.a. galaxy

so you want me to take my MLS gig more seriously? ok, i'll get to that that right after i get back from my next trip to england.

I love going to games, though I must admit that I’ve always loved going to professional games. But still, it’s great to have a place to go with friends to grab a beer and watch some quality football live and in person. Well, at least that’s been the case since the park rangers at the local invitational tournament told me that I can’t drink while watching the youth teams play anymore. Apparently parents don’t like their kids to be “heckled by drunken idiots”… whatever.

But since I’ve started going to MLS games again with greater frequency, the growing passion that I’ve seen in person at the park tells me that the young league is finally starting to develop into a worthwhile and entertaining product. It’s one of the reasons I’ve been making the effort to pay more attention to the domestic league in this country.

But as has been well reported, there still a large contingent of American soccer fans that don’t follow MLS. And for the most part, I’m guilty of being one of this much derided yet extremely coveted segment of the league’s target market. MLS diehards say we’re snooty eurosnobs, yet the league really wants us to watch because they don’t need to convince us to like soccer in the first place.

To be fair, Eurosnobs always have had a series similar, yet legitimate, gripes about the American league: the play isn’t that good (when compared to Europe), there are no intense rivalries, the league isn’t making money, no one goes to the games, the live atmosphere sucks, etc. But like I mentioned above, most of those things are on the mend or have been rectified.

So by that logic, one could expect there to be hoards of former Eurosnobs watching MLS in droves now, right?

Well, no.

But for those of us that who are actually trying to be converted to MLS followers, we have recently been given ample ammunition to go back to join our old ranks.

david and victoria beckham at the royal wedding.

becks looked dapper at an event it made sense for him to attend.

I’m not sure if you remember or not, but a few weeks ago the entire Western media industry was completely enamored with the royal wedding. And due to it, MLS was making minor, related headlines because the league’s marquee player would be in attendance. Much furor was raised because he would be missing training ahead of an important clash with the trailing F.C. Dallas and wouldn’t be rejoining his teammates until the day of the match in Dallas, and for his grave sin of wearing his “order of the british empire” medal on the wrong lapel.

“How dare David skip Galaxy training to attend a wedding!?!?”, many asked with such spite that I often wasn’t sure if they thought Becks had committed a triple homicide or if he was just skipping a few practices.

But if you’re asking me (and you are, because you’re reading my blog), I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.

As has been well noted, Beckham is one of those rare athletes who’s transcended sport (much like Jordan, Muhammed ali, Pele, and Lance Armstrong). He’s a cultural icon, a celebrity, and a humanitarian. These characteristics all make for Dave being an ambassador of the British nation… in fact, I’m pretty sure there are a large number of people around the world who solely identify being British to being David Beckham.

All of this considered, I can find plenty of reason for Beckham needing to be at the royal wedding. Him not being there would have been more of a minor black eye for the British crown. If he hadn’t been, you can easily imagine the press claiming the royal wedding “wasn’t big enough for Becks.”

After all, it was just a practice that was skipped. I’m sure Allen Iverson feels me.

So if I’m not upset about that, why bring it up?

While I can certainly justify Beckham needing to jet across the pond and skip a practice for a royal wedding, I have absolutely no tolerance for him missing a game for anything less than a state affair back home.

And guess what: that’s happening now.

You see, David’s dear friend (and gigantic asshole) Gary Neville decided to retire from Manchester United this season after a long and illustrious career. And as is often the case in England, departing players are often celebrated with a final friendly, testimonial match where that player will get to play with all of his old friends/teammates one last time. Gary’s is against Juventus tomorrow, and David has indicated that he will be playing.

But what did that linked story forget to mention? In order to attend, Beckham will be mising the Galaxy’s game against the Houston Dynamo on Wednesday.

So yeah, David beckham — the face of our freaking league — is skipping a real-life, regular season MLS match that counts for something, so he can go play in game for a team that he isn’t paid vast sums of money by that has absolutely no bearing on any real-life competition.

Galaxy manager and monotone muppet Bruce Arena offered this gem to justify Becks skipping:

“[We} were planning to rest Beckham in the Houston match regardless of this request as [he] picked up a thigh injury in the victory over Sporting K.C. last week.”

beckham playing for a.c. milan

beckham respects MLS so much that he chose to play for milan for a while instead.

Uh, yeah. So you’re allowing your most valuable asset to skip your game to play in a exhibition match when he is hurt. Tell me this isn’t a giant WTF-thought.

So the decision to allow Beckham to skip a game for a non-essential event is the reason I’m all wound up right now. Clearly, the league is allowing David to wear the pants in their relationship, telling them when he thinks playing for the team that pays his salary is important enough.

Would Fulham be okay if Clint Dempsey had told them this season that he would be missing a Premier League match so he could go back to Boston for a testimonial for Taylor Twellman? No, they wouldn’t. And they would laugh at him for asking.

I know that MLS think they need Beckham and his marketing outreach, and they probably do to an extent. But as it showed when Beckham was busy putting himself ahead of the league before while skipping chunks of seasons to play for A.C. Milan on loan, they can get by just fine without him. He is not bigger than this league, and MLS needs to put it’s foot down when it comes to allowing Beckham to think he is.

If Don Garber and company want to really convince the Eurosnob set to respect and watch their league, they need to make sure the “elite” players that they use to bait us in respect the league too.

ten words or less #26

kevin prince boateng and his son jermaine

is it safe to leave children with prince based on what we know about him now?

There are definitely weeks where I could spit out like three ten words or less, and this is one of them. I have to admit that I love all of these little odds and ends type stories that permeate out of the game. And with titles being won and fates being sealed this week, there are tons of little bits to highlight churning out the media mill at the moment.

Also, not a single one of these links is a transfer rumor. Odd for this time of year, don’t you think?

Kevin-Prince Boateng has some smooth moves. – dirty tackle @ yahoo.com

When I open a bar, this will be in it. – youtube.com

Derp. – zenfs.com

Can we charge this author with footy treason? – soccerlens.com

This is the best MLS rivalry by miles. – soccerbyives.com

Manchester City might be calling you an idiot. – mcfc.co.uk

Cheeky shit: I love it. – theoffside.com

Shaking head… he is a typical Scouser at heart. – unprofessionalfoul.com