ten words or less #61

Clint Dempsey and his "Deuce Face"

the mere suggestion that there’s been too much footie on lately should immediately inspire “deuce face” like reactions from all of us.

If you’re anything like me, you’ve had a busy schedule lately. Between all of the normal fall activities that need to take place (raking the leaves, wrapping up the amateur league outdoor season, drinking at tailgates, etc.) and real world work, there’s hardly enough time to take in the copious amounts of Champions / Europa League and World Cup qualifying matches that we’ve been treated to lately. Then I remember that, as a guy that claims he’s on the wrong side of the pond because of the lack of football coverage, I’m not really allowed to bitch about having too much soccer to watch. Right?

Right.

So with the idea of “there’s never too much soccer” firmly implanted in our heads, feel free to enjoy some of the best links I’ve unearthed from around the game over the last week to feed your never-ever ending thirst for information about the game.

For the U.S. to progress, choices have to be made. – nytimes.com

Arsenal’s 14 minute flight to Norwich to avoid traffic jams? – telegraph.co.uk

Good guy, Nemanja Vidić. - sportwitness.ning.com

Nike finally pawns off Umbro… will their renaissance will continue?
- footballshirtculture.co.uk

More like the Final Sunset for England’s “Golden Generation”. – grantland.com

Porto’s Miguel Lopes lets you know exactly what he thinks. – dn.pt

Positive developments in the works for the US Soccer pyramid? – mlssoccer.com

Not to self: do not try to rob Leonardo Bonucci. – dirtytackle.net

Nike took Özil to court over his wearing Adidas boots. – soccerreviews.com

Extremely well done stadium art from the always brilliant @miniboro.
- thebeautifulgear.com

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the inevitable is there

“they’ve done well, but the inevitable is there,” said ray wilkins during his commentary towards the end of last night’s game. and while the former chelsea first team coach’s words were a generous yet accurate assessment of spurs’ performance, the sting was still there. we all knew it would end this way.

ricardo carvahlo pokes the ball away from gareth bale.

even bale's immense talent isn't enough to ward off the inevitable.

thank god for ray, though: he was a like a machine gun that fired off training ground quips at random intervals. if it hadn’t been for his entertaining commentary, i doubt many tottenham fans would have in any way found the match enjoyable.

either way, let’s just say i’m glad i didn’t make any predictions in yesterday’s column.

in a rare display of common sense, even i knew that i would end up putting my foot in my mouth by making some absurd prediction of a tottenham victory in the bernabéu. the yids had already pulled off a miracle this season at the san siro (an argument could even be made that they pulled off two miracles there), but asking for another magical european night facing another storied opponent? nobody’s luck stays good so long.

besides, redknapp had already been mugged in madrid once this year. would it really be that surprising if it happened again?

even with the man advantage for three-fourths of the match, madrid clearly looked the better side. the interplay at the

di maria celebrating his scorcher against madrid

angel di maria's belter was the nail in tottenham's champions league coffin.

top of the pitch between the two-goal adebayor, ronaldo, ozïl and di maria was, at times, a force of nature. the tandem of xabi alonso and khedira completely neutralized any central threat from modrić and jenas. (tangent warning: is it just me, or is jermaine jenas the worst player ever to play in a champions league quarter-final? he didn’t play one positively directed ball, and when he attempted to, he coughed it up every time. i hate him.)

without crouch up top to divert their attention, the madrid back line did little wrong in handling counter attacks sporadically coming out of the tottenham end. and with less defensive responsibility, it allowed marcelo the freedom to regularly join the madrid attack. judging by his performance both tonight and over recent months, i’m guessing the special one is feeling rather justified with hanging on to the emerging brazilian.

sure, the red card certainly threw tottenham’s match plans out the window. but i would venture to say that even if

crouch sees red against real madrid

crouch's stupidity likely didn't impact the eventual outcome that much.

crouch hadn’t been an idiot, spurs would still have been tactically out matched. massimo allegri and rafa benitez are great managers, but neither prepares their side as well as mourinho. and though harry’s not as big of a tactical moron as some like to claim, there’s no doubting that mourinho is a class above in that department.

but like mr. wilkins noted in the opening quote, tottenham’s performance wasn’t all bad. there were positives to glean from the horrid 0-4 scoreline:

  • bale seems to be getting his mojo back. he was able to really open it up a few times last night, a first since he went out injured. moments that stick out were the near miss in the fist half after beautifully chesting down a long ball at the top of the madrid box, as well as a very accurate long throw to van der vaart. he was dangerous enough to draw a ban-inducing yellow on pepe, and should have earned another from sergio ramos on several occasions.
  • michael dawson is definitely emerging as a premier level center back. despite the score, he handled himself very well when facing up against one of the most gifted attacking groups in the world.
  • sandro’s rise to prominence continued last night, though his decision-making at times made me sweat (quit dribbling out of the back!). regardless, his distribution is light years better than palacios and he may soon find himself ahead of even huddlestone when he returns from injury.
  • spurs defended very well with ten men for stretches, and it’s a bit shocking that they held off until the 57th and 72th minutes before conceding the second and third goals. if they had been at full strength, i think a 1-2 or 1-3 scoreline would have been more likely.

despite these bright spots, and even if there had a been a few more, i still knew this was coming. it was “the inevitable.”

yes, the second leg still remains. but it would be foolish to predict another miracle. beating madrid by five goals, even at home, is pure fantasy. getting knocked out the champions league wouldn’t be the worst of scenarios either, allowing spurs to fully focus their efforts on finishing fourth and qualifying for the champions league again.

but i am hoping tottenham will make it competitive this time around. it’s been a fun ride this year, and i’d love to get to see some of the attacking flair that was deprived us last night. and if we’re so lucky, we can all enjoy just one more european night at white hart lane.

wrong side XI

A fellow fan of the beautiful game and I had a colorful discussion today regarding who we both considered to currently be the best left back in the world. The two of us argued the merits and flaws of this player and that for longer than what our manager at work would have liked, yet we weren’t actually able to anoint one player as the supreme left back on the planet.

if you could pick any team you wanted, who would you pick?

After I got over the shock of not being able to “win” a soccer argument, I came to a realization…. it’s not a bad thing that we weren’t able to name just one.

Instead, I figured out that in order to actually answer a very subjective question such as “who is the best player in this position?”, we must first define a specific formation and system into which this prospective player would be inserted.

For example, it wouldn’t make any sense to place a wingback such as Ashley Cole — known for hiw swashbuckling, long runs into the attack — into a defensively-conservative system like that of Tony Pulis’ Stoke City. Similarly, an extremely skilled player like Robinho plays very well as a striker in the hole in a counter-attacking culture that’s prevalent in Italy, but didn’t fill the role well in England because he didn’t defend as much as is required by a Premier League midfielder. See what I mean?

And then it struck me: the brainchild of that conversation should be the basis for a new series of posts on wrong side of the pond. Here’s the scenario:

  • I am given the managerial reigns at a super-rich club, such as a Real Madrid or Manchester City.
  • I have an unlimited transfer budget at my disposal for transfers and wages.
  • I am free to pursue whatever transfer targets I like, regardless of price or availability.
  • All players desire to play for my club, and UEFA’s Financial Fair Play rules don’t exist (though this may be the case anyway, seeing how most teams will still find loopholes).
  • I can choose whatever formation I want, and place the players in it in whatever way I feel fits the system the best.

So with the rules now defined, you’re probably wondering just who I would pick for my starting eleven. And if you’ve asked yourself that, then you totally understand the format for my newest blog series. If you don’t, I’m picking my very own wrong side of the pond XI. Each week, we’ll cover a single position on the pitch, who I would choose, and why. And this week lay the foundation for the weeks to follow by choosing my side’s formation and tactics. Jump past the break to see how I intend to shape my imaginary squad.

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