round-up #10

it’s so unsurprising, but now that i find myself with more time to write than i can remember, there hasn’t been as much going on to write about for these (somewhat) regular news rounds ups. lucky for you, i’ve scoured the deepest reaches of the interwebs to dig up some interesting tidbits that you might have missed during the hoopla of the last week of world cup qualifying.

this is how every ireland fan felt at the time of henry's handball assist to william gallas

grimsby town fan letter –
i doubt many of you spend much of your time following grimsby town of england’s league 2, so it wouldn’t be surprising if you hadn’t noticed that they currently lie 23rd in the table of 24. their poor form hasn’t gone unnoticed though, as they have left some of their supporters infuriated by a supposed lack of effort that will likely see them relegated out of the football league system back to the county leagues. one exasperated fan by the name of “poojah” was so put off by their play that he wrote an open letter to the team to express his displeasure with them. originally published in the local grimsby telegraph, poojah gives a tongue lashing — err, writing? — that leaves no doubt about how he feels:

Use your imagination, guys – strangle yourselves or cover yourself in tinfoil and take a fork to a nearby plug socket, or something. Just put yourselves and us fans out of our collective misery.

trust me, it’s definitely worth the read, especially if your side has ever had you mad enough that you would like to go on a shooting spree in the club offices.

van persie to use placenta fluid to boost recovery –
probably one of the most talked about topics in football right now, but i have to put in my two cents. when arsenal’s dutch striker went down in the holland-italy friendly last weekend, few were surprised to see that he was seriously injured. after all, robin is completely made of glass and is likely the most injury prone player in all of football. what is surprising though is his decision to see a serbian doctor who specializes in the use of placental fluid to help decrease recovery time to serious injuries.

as a former biology major, i can’t tell you that it will for sure help, but it definitely won’t hurt. placental fluid has an extremely high concentration of development hormones and immunological proteins. these could, and i stress could, help van persie’s torn ligaments to heal faster and fight off infection more efficiently. liverpool are claiming the same specialist helped with the recent speedy recoveries of benayoun and reira. but odds are this is just some witchcraft BS that won’t help at all. it does make me wonder though, where is she even getting this stuff from?

al fayed – hodgson is committed –
fulham owner mohamed al fayed has been forced to quash rumors of manager roy hodgson’s imminent departure. after steering “fulhamerica” away from relegation in the ’07-’08 season and into europe last season, it’s easy to see why many clubs and national sides might be interested in the english gaffer. speculation of him leaving has increased of late, seeing how he hasn’t entered into discussions with the club over a new long-term contract. my advice to fulham: give the man whatever he wants and do it quick. the fact that he has done so much with the club on a severely limited budget is nothing short of a miracle. and while shooting for another european spot this season might be a stretch with a thin squad, the london club would be foolish to not tie him up quickly.

as henry shows, footballers can’t be trusted –
undoubtedly the biggest controversy in the sport right now is thierry henry’s handball assist that sent ireland packing in their world cup playoff yesterday.  and i have to admit, the handball is such an un-henry-like action that it even caught me by surprise. sure, the french captain admitted to “accidentally” handling the ball in the post-match presser. but article author john leicester’s complaints that henry celebrated gallas’ goal immediately after, instead of running over to the ref and admitting his cheat, are completely ridiculous. honestly, what footballer, no matter how honorable or decorated, is going to do that?!

however, leicester does raise a good point in here too. video replay is not an answer here, as it is too time consuming and will break the flow of the game that makes the sport so appealing. it’s time for fifa and uefa to stop experimenting with the extra goal-line officials and make them a full-time reality, especially during high profile matches and tournaments. if not, we’ll never hear or see the end of it.

youth soccer goalie scores on her own team –
in what is fast becoming a news round-up trend, here is this week’s video clip of the week. as an ardent follower and player of the game, it always brings back fond memories of my youth to see little kids playing the beautiful game.

to see this little 5-year-old girl accidentally “bicycle kick” the ball into her own net definitely made me LOL. but then i stopped laughing. why you ask? two reasons:

  1. this clip currently has over 320,000 views, and some of the user comments have been a little harsh on the hapless youngster. it’s just a cute little girl who is trying to learn to play soccer, so let’s go easy on her internet trolls. hopefully this doesn’t cause some undue embarrassment for the girl down the road, let alone spoil her opinion of the game.
  2. some day i’m going to have children. i’ve already accepted that karma will repay me with nothing but daughters. and knowing my genetics, i’ll probably be one of those dads that tries to live vicariously through his children. so it’s entirely possible that my daughter(s) will either a) do something like this and i’ll giggle, or b) and most likely, it will be an ominous sign that my daughter(s) will be terrible at the sport i love. frump.

but it’s still funny… and i hope you enjoyed.

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